How Preemie Moms are Chosen

By Erma Bombeck

Did you ever wonder how the mothers of premature babies are chosen?

Somehow, I visualize God hovering over Earth, selecting his
instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he
observes, he instructs his angels to take notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint, Matthew.
Forrest, Marjorie, daughter. Patron Saint, Celia.
Rutledge, Carrie, twins. Patron Saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."
Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles.
"Give her a preemie." The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," smiles God.
"Could I give a premature baby a mother who knows no laughter? That would be cruel."
"But does she have the patience?" asks the angel.
"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she'll drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle it. I watched her today. She has that sense of self and independence so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I'm going to give her has a world of its own. She has to make it live in her world, and that's not going to be easy."
"But Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."
God smiles. "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect She has just the right amount of selfishness."
The angel gasps, "Selfishness?! Is that a virtue?"
God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn't know it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a spoken word. She will never consider a step ordinary. When her child says momma for the first time, she will be witness to a miracle and know it.
I will permit her to see clearly the things I see--ignorance, cruelty, prejudice--
and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."
"And what about her Patron Saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in the air.
God smiles. "A mirror will suffice."



This makes me smile and cry every time I read it. In a sense, its an honor that God saw me fit to take on this immense challenge. And as difficult as it as been, I can't help but feel that I am somehow blessed in all of this. The author is so right - what was another fun milestone to achieve with Carter feels like a miraculous feat with Bennett. I just appreciate all the little things even more. You all will never know how completely amazing it was to get to hold my son for the first time, even though he was over a week old already. How incredibly special it was to put that very first outfit on him when he had been naked for the first 3 weeks or so of life. How the whole world stopped for a moment when that little boy smiled for the first time. Having a preemie who has struggled so much has only made me love being a mother all the more!